In the future the prisons have become even more overcrowded than today, so the government has invented a technology that will put the criminal away for awhile without taking up valuable real estate-- old television programs. Yes, in the future the courts can banish lawbreakers to spend long periods of time as supporting characters in pixel pop culture. Of course, the programs selected cannot be in situations that are too pleasant, so I would like to be the first to propose two options: "The Village" from the 1968-69 BBC series The Prisoner, or, "Teletubbyland" from another BBC series which started in 1997, Teletubbies.

In both situations an idyllic setting serves as camouflage for an Orwellian nightmare lurking beneath the surface. Both are in a world where technology reigns supreme. Number 6 is captured by a giant ball called a "Rover" whenever he attempts to escape, a ball not unlike the prop associated with Laa-Laa the Teletubby. In "The Village," the keepers of Number 6 try different methods of mind control to break the will of their prisoner. In Teletubbyland, a giant windmill spins, making the creatures quake with fear and obey some silent, pre-arranged command. Both settings have dismebodied voices coming from an unknown source ordering the hapless central characters around.

In both worlds we never know exactly who is in charge. Number 6 is on a quest to discover the identity of Number 1, and the smartest figure in Teletubbyland appears to be a four-wheeled vacuum cleaner.

If you go forward in time from the era of The Prisoner, and backward from the time of the Teletubbies, it is no coincidence that you'll land around the year ... 1984!

So imagine you have been sentenced to live in one of these two worlds for six months, but you have the option of selecting which one. Where would you go?