Now that you mention it, bringing puppies on your walk would be a great idea! When they get a little tired and parched after a vigorous walk, bring them to the lake for a little drink of water. (You might even take off their collar -- so constricting and uncomfortable for the poor little puppies -- especially those heavy choker chains.)

I must say, infiltrating OlyBlog to expose craven caiman collaboration is one of the high points of my illustrious career.

Perhaps now the Home Office will believe me. We are dealing with a threat much larger and loomier than Reds or even Satanic Cults.

Of course the threat originates in Olympia, just as I suspected.

That little caiman does look like it is smiling in the photo, or maybe I've been online too long this morning.

Two interesting caiman articles to add to the local lore:

Tuesday, March 1, 2005
Is something lurking in Lake Washington?
It looks like 'head of an alligator,' Medina residents tell police
By GORDY HOLT
SEATTLE POST-INTELLIGENCER REPORTER

MEDINA -- Is it a croc or a crock?

Are razor-toothed reptiles patrolling the waters of Lake Washington? Or has a new suburban legend sprung to life?

Medina wants to know; so does Mercer Island. So do the men and women of law enforcement in both towns.

It was just Wednesday that two reports came in to Medina police that described a shape that looks like "the head of an alligator" near the docks in Lake Washington's Fairweather Bay.

No Bigfoot. No Loch Ness Monster. Not even a critter befitting the descriptions of ancient Indians, whose legends had spotted, horned serpents and other assorted monsters living in the lake.

Still the reports were real enough for police.

Medina police spokeswoman Shannon Gibson would not reveal identities, but said each report was taken seriously and checked out by police -- one by a Medina officer on foot, the other by the Mercer Island Marine Patrol.

"Both were essentially the same," Gibson said. "The people said they saw something that seemed to be a small alligator. The one report said 'head of an alligator.'

"Both were seen from the docks of their residences."

Gibson said there have been no other sightings reported since the two called in on Wednesday.

In a phone call to Sgt. Kim Chandler in the state Department of Fish and Wildlife's regional office in Mill Creek yesterday, there was a long pause before Chandler finally said, "Well, after that cougar was found in Discovery Park back in the 1980s, I've learned never to say never.

"But, in this case I'd have to say, even if it were a caiman (the crocodile's smaller cousin, a native of Central and South America common to the pet-store trade), it would be highly, highly unlikely to see it in that lake this time of year."

His reason, he said, has to do with the nature of caimans and the nature of Pacific Northwest weather.

Crocs and gators and caimans, he said, are coldblooded creatures whose survival depends on the heat of tropical climates.

"Know how cold that lake is right now?" he asked. "Probably something like 47 degrees, which means an animal like that would last for, oh, maybe 20 minutes."

Guides for the care of caimans suggest owners have an enclosure with temperatures that range from 80 to 97 degrees.

Chandler recalled the caimans finally captured sunning themselves at Seattle's Green Lake some years ago, and the caiman captured at the north end of Lake Washington a few years later.

In both cases, he said, it was summer, and in the Green Lake case the water temperature had been pushing past 70 degrees -- still cold by tropical standards.

The owner of a Bellevue pet store has a theory how such a critter might make it outdoors.

Pets & Things owner Elaine Mackin said she and her husband, Bob, don't offer crocodilians for sale at their pet store in Bellevue's Overlake shopping district.

The animals bought as fingerlings grow and grow.

Crocodilians grow fast enough in captivity to make a mess before you know it.

"They're a pain in the (posterior)," she said. "First thing you know, they're 3 feet long and looking to kill you."

So like the bunny set free in a local park, the caiman is released to fend for itself in the decidedly temperate Northwest.

Should the Medina sightings turn out to be more than phantasmagorical, Chandler said, the creature spotted might well have been a turtle up for a little sun on an unseasonably warm February day.

"But even if it was what somebody thought it was," he said, "it won't be eating every Cub Scout in the neighborhood. Most of these caimans we've seen released are not much more than a foot long and wouldn't be a danger to anyone, especially not in these temperatures."

The Medina reports nevertheless have people looking twice at splashes in the lake these days.

Michael Peters, a Fairweather Bay neighbor, said yesterday that he is among them.

"I went out to my boat and saw this big swirl in the water," he said. "We have muskrats. We have some freshwater otters. We have ducks that dive. But usually you see them come up.

"This one didn't."

What a croc: Caimans have been the more common local lizard
2005-03-02
by Chris Winters King County Journal Reporter

If history is any guide, we were overdue for a croc sighting.

The tropical reptiles have shown up in our chilly northern waters at least twice before, roughly once per decade.

Let the name of the beast that was spotted last week near Cozy Cove and Fairweather Bay be the Double-Aught Croc for the decade, or even Craig McCroc, after nearby Hunts Point's most famous resident.

Just lay off the Australian accents. Please.

Truth is, this sighting is still just that. There is no confirmation that there actually is a dentally-endowed reptile in the lake, said Medina Police Officer Shannon Gibson.

Other than the two witnesses who tipped off the police last week, no one else has come forward with a croc-spotting. No small pets have been reported missing.

``At this point it's just a wait-and-see,'' Gibson said. ``They wouldn't be able to survive long in this water.''

On both previous occasions, the encounter actually involved a caiman, a smaller cousin of the crocodile and alligator that is native to southern Mexico and Central America. They grow about one foot a year up to about eight feet.

In spring of 1986, several caimans were spotted in Seattle's Green Lake. Two were captured.

But shortly thereafter, three Lake Washington High teens claimed to have spotted a 2½-foot reptile near the dock at Houghton Beach in Kirkland.

A few days later, the Houghton caiman was spotted again swimming offshore and under the Parkside Condominiums. The Houghton caiman was never captured.

The Green Lake caimans were likely bought in a pet store, then released into the lake when they grew too big at someone's home. The captured caimans were turned over to the Woodland Park Zoo, but they were lethargic and emaciated. One was euthanized and the other sent to a rehabilitation facility in Missouri, where it later died.

``Their health was pretty compromised being out there this long,'' said Woodland Park Zoo spokeswoman Gigi Allianic.

If indeed the animal is a caiman, it's probably in trouble.

``Every hour it is so prone to illness,'' Allianic said. ``An alligator would fare better because they can hibernate.''

In August 1992, a three-foot caiman was captured in Cottage Lake by King County Animal Control crews. At least two had been spotted in the lake northeast of Redmond by fishermen and a kayaker.

Park officials had previously attributed a number of dead ducks found on the site to dogs. They revised their theory after the feisty reptile was pulled out of the lake.

The event prompted King County officials to christen the opening ceremony for the park ``Gator Days.'' The second reported caiman was not found, and people went swimming anyway.

The county posted a sign that read, ``All complaints are being handled by Mr. Al E. Gatter, a local resident. Look for the guy with the toothy smile.''

While caimans are neither endangered nor threatened, some populations are in trouble, and there have been trade restrictions on them since 1999, keeping them out of local pet stores.

``Just hope that some irresponsible pet owner just released it. People do that all the time,'' Allianic said.

If the hypothetical crocodilian turns up and is captured, whether the zoo would take it in would depend on if it had space to quarantine the animal in its hospital, Allianic said. And the zoo probably wouldn't keep it: It's only crocodilian exhibit is a pair of West African dwarf crocodiles.

Aha, is that why The Olympian doesn't want family beds? They want the children elsewhere, as in toddling around the lake, potential caiman fodder?

And is The Olympian's use of thumbs up and thumbs down a covert signal to caiman collectives?

I'm starting to think a lot more than just the Olympian has been commandeered by caimans. When I was a kid it seemed like winters around here were much more severe. We are experiencing global warming. And who is behind it? Caimans! Why? To increase the temperature in lakes all across North America! The caimans spotted in Green Lake and Lake Washington are just the scouts. Now that the Olympia caimans have human type hands, they will no doubt be in the vanguard of this insidious plan. I wonder if any reporters in the White House Press Corps will have the guts to ask what the Feds are going to do about this at the next Presidential press conference?